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If you woke up surrounded by doctors who told you that you'd been in a medical experiment since birth and that your entire life had been a dream, how do you think you'd react?

"... How do I know this isn't a dream too?"

"Because we just informed you it wasn't."

"Uh-huh. Sure...  So, if this is reality, am I actually sick?"

"No, you are actually in perfect health."

"What about my mother and my dogs?  Were they all a dream too?"

"Yes, they were.  You have never been outside of this facility..."


"Well, doc as I see it, you have two choices." *Calmly reaches for the scalpel on the medical tray nearby and graps it firmly.*
"Either you put me back inside the dream, with me winning the lotto and becoming a successful author that is married to oh say Helena Bonham Carter... Yeah, hmm that sounds good. *smiles*  Or I kill you all..."

"You are our experiment.  You don't have any say in what happens to you now." 

"Sorry doc, that was the incorrect answer..." *grins maniacally*


Writer's Block: Bite Me

From Dr. Polidori's Lord Ruthven to Stephenie Meyer's Edward Cullen, the annals of vampire lore are filled with attractive, charming bloodsuckers. Which one would you most want to be bitten by?
I already know I am going to get flack for this, but I would want to be bitten by Lucian of Underworld.  I know he is not a vampire, but I LOVE Lycans, fur, claws fangs and all!!!!  I would be more than happy to be bitten, be allowed to live and when the full moon rises, join into the ranks of my LYCAN brethren.

For the sake of appeasing the masses, Pam from True Blood (sooo hot!), Sonja, Selene (after she drank Alexander Corvinus' blood) or Viktor (I could deal with being his undead daughter), and if I absolutely Had to choose one of the Cullens (cringes) it would have to be Alice or Esme (They're husbands could take a hike...my woman now ^_^! )

Writer's Block: Regrets Only

Do you think that animals feel regret?

Writer's Block: Beautiful Vistas

What is the most beautiful view you've ever seen? Have you been there, or do you plan to visit? If you have one, share a picture.
When I was 17 I went to Okinawa in a cultural exchange.  The group I was with went on a weekend retreat on the outskirts of Nagoshi.  There was a small observation that you go to off the main building to look over the city and the surrounding mountains.  I went out there at sunset and it was absolutely breathtaking!  Shikinaen Royal Gardens was also gorgeous.  Another of my favorites is watching the sunset over Lake Michigan while sitting on the beach or atop a dune.


Illness has been something that has always been a loyal friend to me.  It was there when I was young and came down with pneumonia at the tender age of two and continued to haunt until I reached the age of thirteen when my grandmother was diagnosed with terminal cancer.  For sometime illness had seemed to have taken a vacation.  During this time I was able to breathe once again and feel some sense of freedom from grief, despair, pain and mourning.  What I failed to realize then was that illness brought with a great sense of loneliness.  I am no longer a child that wonders why her poppy can barely walk or a thirteen year old that thinks if she denies it long enough, her grandmother will pull through.  I am a twenty year old young woman who is now finding out first-hand what illness is like.  I have always had scoliosis.  From as far back as I can remember I have gone to doctors to have my spine evaluated for changes in its curviture, my hips and shoulders measured to see if one side has risen and my joints checked to see if they have begun to solidify.  Two years ago I began to notice that I was beginning to walk differently.  My gait had changed and for a time I had a slight limp. I brought it up to my doctors, but they ignored it saying everything was ok.  My body began to compensate and my skeleton shifted to accommodate the shift in my spine.  I no longer limp due to the shift, but my gait has widened, no longer am I able to walk "like a lady" as my mother asks of me frequently.  My rib cage has shifted slightly and with the shift has come more problems.  I have what my doctors suspect is slipping rib syndrome.  My nerves are being trapped whenever my now loose rib shifts.  The pain can range from a dull ache to the point where I double over grasping my side unable to breathe for fear I will only aggravate it further prolonging the episode  or worse, worsening the pain to where I have to grab what is closest for support.  The other diagnosis might be thoracic nerve root impingement.  Either way, it is only giving a identity to the cause of my suffering.  It has gone past the point of discomfort now.  For six months doctors put it off and now I am the one to pay the price for their negligence.  I am nauseated all the time and have been placed on a variety of medications while the doctors have beaten around the bush.  You may ask why I am writing about this.  The answer is both complex and simple.  An assignment for my healthcare ethics class has spurred me on to write about this.  We had to read a novel named The Lonely Patient.  Until you are ill yourself, you can never fully comprehend what it is like.  This ordeal has opened my eyes to a range of emotions and thoughts that I have never experienced before.  I never understood how lonely it is to be ill until now.  Although you have others around you that seek to comfort you and help you through, you still feel alone because you are the one that is sick.  You are the one that is expected to fight the illness and deal with everything that comes with your affliction. Reading this book has helped me to better understand what I am experiencing and has eased the sense of loneliness slightly.  I am thinking of keeping a diary to help me remember what it was like to be a patient.  That way when I am a doctor I will never lose sight of what it is like to be a patient and to better understand what my patients are feeling.

My first entry...

Oooo how exciting! My first posting here. ^_^ I am going to try my hand at a few fics this summer, the first entailing a crossover with Birds of Prey and Hellsing mixed in with a little original character goodness. if you actually take a gander at my work, please feel free to leave a comment. Please be gentle, I have never written a fic before so haha guess on with the show^^. First post should be in a few days.